I missed yoooou!
I miss writing here.
I miss everything.
It's been so loooong.
Everything has changed. Everything--the way I talk, the way I think, the way I move, the way I behave. Oops, not really. I'm still me, a lost girl who needs to figure out what she really wants. A coward girl who dreams big but doesn't make any move to achieve it. A pessimist girl who wants to experience everything but accomplishes nothing. A quitter. A loser. An ordinary girl. A typical girl who you won't notice when passing the streets.
Yay, that's me. Too much for putting myself down. I graduated from a prestigious university a month ago. I applied for jobs and got rejected too. I have my hopes and dreams shattered because you know, real-world is evil. You thought after college, it's the end? NO. A BIG NO. You should not become complacent and get high hopes from all the congratulations you received from the people around you. It shouldn't be only 'congratulations', they should add 'good luck' or 'welcome'. I repeat, this is not the end of the story; this is just a beginning. College is just a training ground for you to grow and for you to become strong. It prepares you for the bigger, wilder, and harsher world. Yes! That so-called real world.
I'm a quitter, at times (haha one proof is the previous blog post that I didn't finish. Well, that one was the internet's fault. The net corrupted and bang, my post was ruined. hihi. And I didn't want to repeat my drama, hello that was emotional torture, so hey there, enough was enough). And if I could, I would also quit and end this game. I just want to go back to college and study and study. I don't want these changes that are happening to me (or should I say, I'm not yet ready for this). huhu courage, where are you????
Actually, I already have a job (I will start next week), but still, I am afraid. My employers have high expectations of me. I came from the premier university of the country so they think that I am a smart kiddo. Oooh, how I wish. T.T but... but... but... I don't want to fail them. Don't pressure me. Don't expect, or else you'll get disappointed. :(
Oh, how fast time flies. Back in my elementary and high school days, I was on the top, but now, I am just an average girl trying to be as competitive as others. Oh how time flies, I missed the feeling of not minding everything. I hate what I am becoming--always comparing the self to others. =_=
But, sighhhhhhhhhh, okay that's it. Here's a picture to remind myself that it is alright to become an average (or the-not-so-smart-gal), I should focus more on my accomplishments. Because I was too busy comparing myself to other people, I forgot the very essence of life, at least I'm moving. I'm closer to my dreams than in the past. I have traveled far and is still traveling. Although there are humps and obstacles on the way, I won't stop moving until I die. Progress and self-growth are good for my health :)
♥ ☺ ♥ And that what life brings. ♥ ☺ ♥
